Position ambition: stretching for sex with a ballet dancer

In my years of being a professional dancer, I’ve learnt that the associated flexibility remains a hot topic of interest for many. On social media channels, a dance photo of someone in ‘the splits’ seems to hold more currency than something arguably more arty. This got me thinking about flexibility, sex, and the steps to enjoying a more creative horizontal pas de deux. . .

Whilst I don’t claim expertise in choreographing bedroom acrobatics (google will provide truly fascinating inspiration) I can share some thoughts on how exploring your own body through movement can potentially benefit those out there keen to up their position ambition when it comes to sex.

One of the many benefits of dancing regularly is the very personal physical education you receive – both conscious and unconscious – of your own anatomy. You develop an intrinsic awareness of all the moving parts in your body; how they move, how you control and manipulate them in space, areas of natural mobility and where you hold tension. This physical awareness is empowering – when you’re feeling healthy and connected, your sensory experience is enriched at a cellular level – and when things aren’t feeling so good you have the knowledge to quickly identify and resolve it.

This physical awareness is empowering – when you’re feeling healthy and connected, your sensory experience is enriched at a cellular level – and when things aren’t feeling so good you have the knowledge to quickly identify and resolve it.

This kind of awareness is obviously not exclusive to dancers – the challenge is finding the way in that works for you and to make the time in a busy world where it’s too easy to spend days static in front of screens. Taking yourself out of your mind and situating yourself in your body is an incredibly powerful tool. It helps you feel safe in your own skin, assists with relaxation, and soothes anxiety – basically all the key elements to feeling sexy and free.

Taking yourself out of your mind and situating yourself in your body is an incredibly powerful tool. It helps you feel safe in your own skin, assists with relaxation, and soothes anxiety – basically all the key elements to feeling sexy and free.

Yoga, with its balance of strength, stretch, breathwork and meditative element serves to create a healthy and happy body, mind and spirit, and is an obvious recommendation for those looking to increase their split-ability. Importantly, in practicing yoga you are gaining strength around muscles and joints whilst moving and stretching – this point is crucial – overstretching and creating too much mobility will only result in a lot of aches and pains, not to mention loss of strength and coordination.

You can also get in tune with your body using Alexander Technique: guided classes on how to move your body through day to day movements with more efficiency, promoting better posture and ease of breathing amongst many other benefits. A personal favourite of mine is a Gaga dance class – no, unfortunately not a one on one with the Lady herself – but rather, a class in dance movement language created by world-renowned choreographer Ohad Naharin. The classes are available on zoom, for dancers and non-dancers alike, and are a guided exploration of the body, sensation and imagination, fostering the pleasure of freedom of movement. There’s no right or wrong – just you and your body in your loungeroom. Plus, they end with some fun music so you can just let loose and interpretive dance your heart out, it’s a wonderful dance-based meditation.

When it comes to ambitious positions in the bedroom feeling safe, healthy, and aware in your body is key to moving it with ease.

When it comes to ambitious positions in the bedroom feeling safe, healthy, and aware in your body is key to moving it with ease. Below are some basic stretches that you can do at home to get things moving. So, get that body mobile whether solo or a in horizontal pas de deux (or trois + if it pleases you) and enjoy feeling all your cells sizzling!